3D-The darkest deep down...

How helpless i was....
standing there can't do anything...

Everybody must have the thought of
"padan muka" on that time...
Ya right...Indeed...
Just want to do something for friend....
Want them to spend their special day
LIKE a special day
INSTEAD of passing the special day
just like a NORMAL day...
I guess all people know
the feelings of celebrating special day ALONE...
I felt it much...Don't want anybody to be like me....

Still remember in form 4 and form 5...
I was a disaster...
Still remember i'm always
the target when it comes to discipline...

Knowing that Form 6 is a chance
for me to have a new beginning...
I've changed myself...

Become a lil different from what i was...

Not the best...
but at least better than the "ponteng school" girl rite??
Now...I am the "ponteng class"girl...
Next time...I maybe won't have any nick name anymore...
but time are not given...
I must be like this, this, this and that now...

Now....at this moment
Now....at this hour
Now...at this second
I'm just a human being...
To let go of someone...
it took me few years...
Now...to really change myself...
Do u think i can do it in a second??

Afraid that I will lose myself again like last time...

Trying my best to keep myself the way i am now...
Tired...and wanted to give up...
but still holding on bcoz i really want to have a better life...
Really don't want to be who i was...
It was the worst nightmare ...
Does anybody understand??
Not only people around me...
Even me,myself...
Wanted to change too...desperately...

Ker...I miss you...
At least u can lend me ur shoulders when i wanted to cry...
Can't wait for u to come back...
I can't stand back-stabbed and being embarrase anymore....

-sTuPiD-
feeling even worse day by day....
hope that time can pass even faster...
want to get out of there asap....
don't want to go there anymore...T.T